On the way back from the first wig fitting we stopped off in a pub.
It was Steve’s suggestion and a really good idea. We didn’t go to that pub as it wasn’t local for us so I knew I would know absolutely no-one there and would be able to confidently walk in with my new ‘hair do’.
Big tip here …. and even if you know your nearest and dearest will be supportive (I’m sure they will be) on that first outing I advise you go somewhere where no-one will know you. It will give you a huge boost of confidence as no-one will ask any questions because they won’t know it’s not your real hair!
On the drive there though, I kept ‘checking myself out’ in the little vanity mirror in the sun visor. I’ve never been particularly vane, but was trying to get used to the way I now looked because as good as the wigs are, and they are good, they are still not ‘your’ hair so inevitably you do look different.
I have to say that each time I looked at my reflection I was greeted by someone who was me and who wasn’t me at the same time, almost as if I was masquerading as myself. I kept pulling the wig down a bit, pushing it back, adjusting here and there. I was happy with it, but I couldn’t seem to stop fiddling with it.
My glasses were also an issue as they didn’t seem to fit ‘over’ the wig very well.
Wigs have two side bits that sit on your ‘temple’, very close to where your glasses would rest. You can’t put the side arms of the glasses underneath and they have to rest on the top. However, this means that the hair is then tucked under the arms of your glasses and doesn’t fall naturally as your real hair would as synthetic wig fibres are much thicker than real hair.
As a result, and when I fiddled with the hair so that it ‘fell over’ the arms of the glasses, I could then see the edge of the wig, although in truth, I expect no-one else could. It’s a bit like when you have a spot on the end of your nose. When you look in the mirror it is ALL you can see, but when others look at you they barely notice it.
I still struggle with the glasses and a wig and wish I could wear contact lenses. If you have that option, do it, as you will find wearing a wig a lot easier.
Anyways, into the pub we rocked, ordered a beer and chatted about ….. yep, you’ve got it, hair and wigs.
Unfortunately, that was all that was on my mind at that point, so @friends and family, be prepared to listen to endless hours of wig related stuff, how it makes them feel, what they like, what they don’t like, what you think about this, what you think about that.
Just nod and smile, join in with an opinion here and there, and whatever you do be honest.
If you think your daughter / son / friend / girlfriend / boyfriend / wife / husband looks ridiculous in that particular wig, they probably do so say so, but nicely of course.
It’s the equivalent of ‘does my bum look big in this’, and this phase of continually looking for re-assurance will pass as it did with me.
Anyway, after our drink we headed home and I decided to build on my growing confidence, and ‘come out’, at least virtually.
Steve wasn’t sure about this decision, but my thinking was that I was bound to be at the pub that weekend, probably with my wig on, and I didn’t want people looking at me and thinking “ummm somethings different, what is it?”
I wanted to avoid those awkward moments, because most people, even friends, wouldn’t just blurt out “are you wearing a wig?”, and neither did I want to have to explain it over and over again particularly as not everyone knew that I was losing my hair, so for some at least it would be a surprise. The last thing I wanted was to have to ‘announce it’ to all and sundry.
Social media often gets bad press, but at times like this it can also lend a helping hand, so I posted on my Facebook page to prepare everyone for my new style, and the picture I posted can be seen above – yep thats me 🙂
The encouraging comments and positivity I received was so fantastic, and when I went to the pub on Sunday as planned with my new hair I wasn’t worried in the slightest and instead of odd looks and hushed comments, I got lots of hugs and congratulations for how brilliant I looked. Some hadn’t even seen my post and commented on my great new haircut.
So, and for my lovely friends, and you know who you are, thank you so much, as you made this part of my journey so easy xx
